disclosure

I have no idea what I’m doing.

I’m a wife but how do I be married? I have a kid but how do I be a mom? I have a brain but how do I think healthily? I have a heart but what does it beat for? I have hands but for what do I use them? I have feet but where do I go?

I don’t know. I can’t pretend to know

any longer.

I can use internet to know,

but he is just as confused as I am.

I can ask all the people swimming around me,

but how can someone who doesn’t know how to swim save a drowning soul?

We’re all pretending we know.

We like to think we know.

Deep down we all know we don’t know. Look at sad. Look at worry. Look at mad and fear and reaching for the remote. the cigarette. the bottle. the pill. the credit card. the pennies. the other person.

Look at

the existence of bombs.

broken hearts.

spilled blood.

Fumbling my way through is not my avenue.

There’s this book called the Bible. the more I know it’s Author and I become what He says, the more I stop stumbling.

There’s this thing, this thing that I never knew existed, before I met Him. It’s called peace. And it’s awesome. Being at peace with God is the best. Living His way by His grace, there’s nothing like it on all the earth. No amount of money, makeup, work, being “good” can compare or purchase this happy, this joy. This joy is a gift. Available to all.

receive by faith.

I have no idea what I’m doing. but God knows exactly what He’s doing.

the only thing I know

is Him.

and I’m okay. ❤

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The Only Thing That Matters

In the circle of dawn to dusk, man pursues many things. There is one thing that surpasses them all. Indeed, to lack this one thing makes all else vain.

Relationship with God.

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Better than anything this world offers, a relationship with God is like treasure. To find Him, is to lose everything, to have the only thing.

Prayer, fellowshipping with God, is backbone to relationship with Him.

The Bible says to pray constantly (1 Thessalonians 5:17). Prayer is both listening and speaking with Him. The Bible also says to be quick to listen and slow to speak (James 1:19). Ecclesiastes 5 says it is better to draw near to listen than to offer the sacrifice of fools.

I’m reading the Psalms now. It’s amazing how honest and raw they are. The Psalms encourage me to make my heart fully known to the Lord, while always remembering truth. Honest prayer.

Not to forget the Holy Spirit. Our Helper, spirit of Truth, Teacher, Guide, Comforter, and so much more.

It’s easy to think: if only Jesus were physically here with me.

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Jesus said it is better that He go and the Holy Spirit come! If we truly believe this, it changes everything! The Spirit of Christ is alive inside of us!! Woah!

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The best and only thing that matters, is knowing Jesus. I encourage you to go into  your room, close the door, and spend time with Him. No matter if you’ve gone to church for decades, or you’ve never thought of God before, He’s waiting to meet with you.

The God of the universe loves you. Go to Him, just as you are.

Yesterday’s post, How to Stay Out of Prison, discusses living out relationship with God, too.